The art of sleepwalking . . .

I have always been an odd sleeper. My mum in fact even told me that as a child I would come down the stairs a few hours after bedtime and with eyes open I would sit down on the couch beside them completely unresponsive and unspeaking and my mum would say “its time for bed” and I would go back to my room. Entirely asleep. Creepy right? Well I think so. Lucky for me, if before bedtime I tell myself no dreams, no sleep walking, no sleep talking then I tend to not to do it but remembering to do so isn’t always my forte.

So my poor Josh puts up with an awful lot of my sleep chatting but I think he has at least gotten used to it now as long as I’m not too annoying! (one night I may or may not have rolled over sat up and pointed my finger at an awake Josh and told him under no uncertain terms that, “There will be no drugs in this house!” Apparently it was quite frightening, I wouldn’t know, I was still asleep. Sorry cutie!) but anyway, it wasn’t until I uploaded these photos on flickr that I noticed it, my eyes are closed for most of these pictures! I promise I was awake this time but apparently windy weather means keeping my eyes open is extremely difficult!

and one last one for good measure. I call this mid-nap jess . . .

 

The Battlefield: Aka The trip to the Hygienist. Oh, and clothes.

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Blazer: F21 (old but a classic they seemed to get in everyyear) Necklace: Accessorize 2013 Similar Tee Shirt: H&M Basics Harem Trousers, Next Heels: New Look, similar, similar

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Lipstick: Yves Saint Laurent (le Orange) with Estee Lauder (which was a limited edition can’t remember the name but this is a close colour in Plum Couture Mascara: Estee Lauder Sumptuous Foundation, Loreal Perfect Match in Ivory Powder: True Match, Loreal Rose Ivory Bronzer: Max Factor Eye Liner: Bourjois club liner

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So this is how the hygienist went today. Firstly I’m sitting there like this hurts like a mother bear. What are you trying to do, remove my teeth? Hey I need those!

And the next thing I know, she is watering down my face. Like honestly I showered this morning already, hello make up? And she’s like “Oh I’m sorry, I got blood on your face.” On my face! Like seriously? I did not come here for a Kim Kardashian endorsed facial! On the plus side I currently have rock star teeth, you know the ones where they are so beautiful you don’t want to eat anything again in case it stains them and well, ok it hurts like hell and to think of ever biting anything again is just. . . no.

But anyway . . .

I’ll see you in three months time hygienist! And next time I’m coming with my battle armour and a face guard. ‘cause that’s how we do it here in Maidstonia.